Friday, May 9, 2014
Mother’s Day is Sunday and I really wanted to write about my mom. But I’m finding I’m still selfish about the memory of her. (Almost ten years have passed since she has. I’m pretty stingy.) So I will write about passions. My mom had hers and in later years she was too busy with either work or her ten grandchildren (also passions of hers) to fully enjoy them, not that she ever voiced regret. Her greatest passion was, after family and friends, art. She painted, pasteled, sketched and drew. I knew her passion at a very young age. I remember when I was four or five years old watching my dad add his touches to one of her oil paintings that she had left out to dry. I was shocked that he’d paint on her work, something so personal. I don’t know what happened when she found out, but the memory stayed with me that her art was sacred to her. We should all know that about mom at a young age.
During the weeks leading up to Mother’s Day, as a preschool teacher there are motherly projects that we work on each year. One is a questionnaire for our students asking them about their mom.
How old is your mom?
How much does she weigh?
What’s her favorite color?
A lot of the answers are fun and they tend to reflect their feelings instead of their mom’s. More questions:
What makes your mom laugh?
What would your mom do if she had more time?
What does your mom love to do to relax?
I love it when they have an immediate answer without having to think about it, no matter what their answer is.
It means that they have seen the happiness on her face when she does those things that she loves. Even if it’s sitting down to watch a favorite TV show or sleeping in.
I recently asked my daughter what she felt my passions were. She knew them.
"Writing, drawing, Haagen-Dazs Chocolate ice-cream and butterflies!"
I WAS surprised that she left out a few. I LOVE putting on my pajamas, and I LOVE getting into bed. She knows this for sure. Those aren't all of my passions, but I’d passed this mommy test.
Sometimes I have students who can’t think of anything that makes their mom happy. Her passions are theirs. This is true for me as well. To see my daughter or my son have fun and smile and laugh is a passion beyond words. Even more so if they do it together. So yes, I love to see her ride her bike or dance in her recital. But it’s just as important for her to see MY passions.
Instill passion in your children.
Not by telling them to be passionate about their hobby, but by letting them see YOUR passion. When you want to put on your pajamas, don’t say, “I’m going to put on my pajamas, I’m exhausted.” Instead say, “I’m going to put on my pajamas. Who’s with me!?”
And argue a little bit harder when they want to eat your last bite of that chocolate ice-cream cone. “You can have a couple of bites, but save the last one for me!” Pass on the passion. Let them know that life is to be enjoyed, even the small things. Especially the small things. ~Katherine A. Rayne~
Katherine A. Rayne is the author of Back To Being A Woman (Without Changing The Man), a book to help us in our relationships. Even with our children and friends, but most importantly with ourselves. Find her book on Amazon.com in paperback or ebook form.
Enjoy the little things! They are the big things!